#248: Blessings to Count

Changes are happening. Good changes.

Now that I'm off the pain killers my sleep is much more normal. I'm actually awake during the day. This is a blessing because the days are so beautiful this week. Miserable to be outside in, but lovely to look at. Staying awake all day also helps me sleep at night. That's good because nighttime is when the worst anxieties come along.

My stomach has settled down. We're trying a day without the anti-nausea drugs. That torture has left me alone for a few days. So has the sore throat. Those are the two things I hate the most about being sick.

The depression has passed for a while. So long, old friend. See you next time. Life never looks better than during the days after a depressive bout. The most wonderful part of the disease is that it feels so good when it's over. Like hitting yourself with a hammer.

Still no food by mouth, but I am drinking more water to keep my swallowing muscles working. As soon as I can a stand the taste, I'll be guzzling those protein shakes like a madman. 

One funny side effect of losing my teeth... I have these crazy fingernails. I'm not sure quite what to do with them. I've always been a nervous biter. Now that they're growing, I have these grooming decisions to make. Trim them? Get a manicure? Let the m grow wild like Howard Hughes? All I know is that they make itching a much more rewarding experience.

While my nails are growing, my beard is showing no signs of returning and my hairline is still very high in back. I've stopped shaving my head though, and it's coming back nicely up top.

My improved condition means that Mrs P can get out of the house more. That is good for her mental health, which is good for both of us. I've a long list of blessings today. A good day to be Pennsy.